My Reverse Bucket List

We’re here for a good time
Not a long time
So have a good time
The sun can’t shine every day…
~Trooper

This is a concept I just heard on CBC radio.  The Reverse Bucket List is a list of times in your life that you would love to return to or that you are happy about or proud of or that taught a great lesson that you carry forward through your life.  So, looking back on your life for the best, most profound or impactful moments instead of always projecting that those moments need to happen in your future.  It is a method of making yourself happy for the accomplishments of your life thus far.  I realized, while writing my list below, that that is mostly what I am doing by writing this blog. I’m writing my reverse bucket list!

Here’s my list (with links to the stories that correspond).  No particular order except the first two are the top for a reason.

  1. Eloped to marry my best-friend and we are celebrating 28 years this year (2020);
  2. Had a son and stayed home to raise him for his first five years;
  3. Trekked for a month in Nepal in the Himalayas;
  4. Traveled by VW Van all over Canada, including the North West Territories and Yukon and into Alaska, visiting one national park in each province, territory and in Alaska;
  5. Hiked the 3-day Chilkoot Trail from Bennett, B.C. to Skagway, Alaska;
  6. Traveled and worked on a farm in Australia;
  7. Visited the Taj Mahal; and witnessed pilgrims bathing in the Ganges in India at dawn;
  8. Backpacked with our 4-year old throughout Mexico’s West Coast and Central America;
  9. Moved to a small Nova Scotian town without jobs and made our lives from scratch with our four-year old because we wanted him to be able to walk to school safely;
  10. Founded and incorporated a small education-services business for 15 years and employed three others besides myself;
  11. Posted a listing on AirBnb and hosted folks from all over the world;
  12. Started a school garden with a friend and taught children how to sow, germinate, water, grow, harvest and save seeds from scratch;
  13. Lived and worked in Germany for three years and visiting most countries near there;
  14. Lived in Virginia, USA for two years then packed a large U-Haul and drove home to Canada and we were glad to be home (sorry American friends, no offence);
  15. Took a gondola ride in Venice and then got somewhat lost in its ancient twisty turny laneways;
  16. Drove from Germany into Czechoslovakia just after the 1989 removal of the Berlin wall and witnessed a country coming alive;
  17. Had four big dogs (not all at once) and a cat who were cherished as part of our family, And currently have a doodle who is just too darn cute and funny!
  18. Snorkeled the Great Barrier Reef in Australia;
  19. Completed the scuba dive licence which was very difficult for me due to my claustrophobic tendencies.  (I no longer dive but I love to snorkel);
  20. Rappelled down a cliff on basic training in 1986 in Chilliwack, B.C. (9 PLATOON DOGS OF WAR!);
  21. Rappelled out of a helicopter on a special training day;
  22. Joined a group seven-day biking trip through France and gained a very sore bottom;
  23. Marched in the International Nijemgen Marches in Holland in 1989.  160 km over four days;
  24. Skied in the Swiss and the Austrian Alps;
  25. Own a house out-right with my husband;
  26. While living in the Arctic hand-built several high-fired, clay pots and still have some of them over 25 years later;
  27. Taught my son to sign American sign-language before he could speak;
  28. Was sporty and a scholar at school, for the most part;
  29. Completed Advanced Yoga Teacher Training at an ashram in the Bahamas;
  30. Taught yoga;
  31. Joined a book club and read daily;
  32. Took several horse-archery ground training lessons and loved it;
  33. Mastered a hand-stand with no wall;
  34. Made yogurt from raw farm-fresh milk for years;
  35. Joined the Army and stayed in for several years, leaving honourably as a Captain*;
  36. Completed Recruit Term at Military College outside Victoria, B.C. and it was tough;
  37. Completed Off-Road driver training in the Army;
  38. Shot a fire-arm with fairly good accuracy, and cleaned it, stripped it and reassembled it blindfolded;
  39. Completed the Officer Challenge twice (only woman): 75 km trek over 24 hours with 18 mini-competitions, in combat gear, in France;
  40. Was awarded the Sword of achievement for Junior Officer of the Year while in the army;
  41. Besides my first language of English, I can communicate somewhat in French, German, Spanish and American Sign-language;
  42. Studied dance for several years as a girl and still love to dance;
  43. Was a gymnast in elementary school and won a silver medal in a competition for the county;
  44. Have traveled by jet, helicopter, ferry, ship, sail boat, canoe, kayak, stand-up paddle board, car, truck, bus (both inside and on top of!) and train, including a train across most of Canada for days and into the heart of Australia on the Gahn and in Northern India;
  45. Hitch-hiked successfully in Canada and Australia;
  46. Witnessed flying foxes by the thousands in Australia;
  47. Have driven back and forth across Canada (several times) including solo enroute to Logistics training in the Army in 1988;
  48. Have been to all Provinces of Canada and two of the territories;
  49. Have lived and worked north of the 66th parallel, two hours North of the Arctic Circle;
  50. Was ‘Screeched In’ in Newfoundland where my husband is from;
  51. Hiked Gros Morne Mountain in Newfoundland and met curious Elk while on top of its tablelands;
  52. Sewed some clothing and curtains with a sewing machine, self-taught then decided I wouldn’t be doing that again;
  53. Learned how to cut a basic haircut from my sister;
  54. Met a harem of Bison in a National Park in Alberta;
  55. Miscarried my second son, late, which was heart-breaking but which helps me to cherish given life;
  56. Learned how to read music and play piano and the flute a bit of guitar and banjo;
  57. Met, hugged and kissed Deepak Chopra before he was very famous; and
  58. Love nature and simple times and love to laugh and be silly;
  59. Have read a friend’s manuscript and helped with some edits;
  60. Am currently living in the 2020 / 2021 COVID-19 world pandemic 😷

*

These are comments from the best leader I encountered while in the Canadian Army.  Colonel (retired) Gordon Grant Says:

“I have read the entire blog and will use this opportunity to make some summary comments. First, unlike your readers, I was with you for a small part of your journey. You and Dean were lieutenants under my command in Germany. I watched your personal relationship grow as well as your professional development. This gave me a reference point on which to gauge your stories. I found myself constantly comparing the lives of M and Dean as I understood them, against the reality check provided in your stories. Your blog confirmed (and reinforced) my good opinion of you both. But I had no idea that you were in constant crisis. And I am gobsmacked at the challenges you faced and overcame. You and Dean are strong, compassionate and committed partners, parents and citizens. Your travels have armed you with a mature appreciation of other cultures. You showed tremendous courage in writing this blog. You presented a frank and transparent presentation of your life. It is well written and takes us to euphoric heights and the depth of your despair. Your willingness to address the most intimate details will help others with their struggles. You are a talented writer. You combine humour with a no-holds-bared approach to describing your journey. You need to keep writing for two reasons: a. Writing is your cathartic release. It is an important coping tool in your tool box; and b. There are countless people who face similar challenges and would benefit from your shared experiences. It provides a desperately needed hope. Well done, M, well done, indeed.

(picture of view from top of Gros Morne Mountain is from google images…thank you)